FranklinX 37 Report post Posted January 8, 2010 My mother just called me. My father just died. He was living in a veterans home for about 4 years. For the last three years he has not been able to move and talk. I must be honest with all of you. I am not hurt. I do not feel sad. My father is not a major part of my life. As a child he only called me on the phone. He rarely sent gifts for Christmas and Birthdays. One Christmas he sent me his old clothes to wear. I don't need any used clothes because I have money to buy new clothes. My father loved my sister. He did everything for her. He made sure he had a relationship with her and her children. I am not jealous of her. I am just stating the facts. Throughout my life I never asked myself "Why don't my father love me?", "Why is my dad not there for me?", "What is wrong with me?". I never asked myself any of these types of questions because I am not hurt. I cannot force anyone to love me. You cannot miss someone who was never there. I can't say I love my father because he was never there. However, I don't hold anything against him to disrespect him. I am continuing to live my life. I am wrong for not caring about my father's death? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Noob Saibot 38 Report post Posted January 8, 2010 One can not judge unless they had a father or mother who was never there. Both of mine would and it would be wrong for me to make that type of judgement as if I walked in your shoes I probably would feel the same way. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Leon 55 Report post Posted January 9, 2010 Listen to 'A Boy Named Sue'. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tomo2000 60 Report post Posted January 9, 2010 I don't think your wrong. I don't feel guilt or remorse so when my grandfather died 4 years ago I didn't feel sad although he was always there for me. Slightly, yes, but nothing after he was gone. He's just a memory now. Anyway, I'm sure that during those last few years that, if he could talk, he would tell you how much he loved you. Anything you have left of him you should cherrish and keep. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Marked 197 Report post Posted January 10, 2010 If he was not there, 'father' is simply a title. It's hard to give an opinion when its nearly impossible to put yourself in someone elses context. You are here because of your father and you have his blood. I think because of that you should care a little bit, that's not to say be sad as there's no emotional attachment. I hope this isn't inappropriate, but my condolences to your family. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
